When you are on a journey where there are so many unknowns, uncertainties, no promises and so many factors that you do not have control over it is very empowering to know yourself, understand your emotions , how they are guiding you and that you can feel in control. In control of how you feel, how you react and respond. In control of what you choose to see, hear and take on board. The stories you tell yourself, about what others are saying or thinking and indeed that you tell yourself.
Yesterday a fellow practitioner asked me for my card and a synopsis of what I do as she felt she had a client I might be able to help. When asked what it is that I do. I can respond that I support others with emotional wellbeing. With loss, trauma, grief and understanding emotions wherever they are on their journey. That I use a unique blend of Counselling, Psychology, Neuroscience, Coaching and Mind/Body Techniques. Supporting those in fertility, otherhood, pregnancy, preparing for parenthood or indeed wherever they are in life. That is all so vague and impersonal.
To understand is to experience and to feel for ourselves. So how to I describe that?
As I have journeyed with others I realise more and more that it is not what I do but rather how the person feels. How they feel when they start and how they feel (even after one session) as we explore what is going on for them. The difference having a space to do so is the piece that is so important.
What I don’t promise is that you will get pregnant, stay pregnant or have a baby or that your family will grow. Nobody can promise that or even hint at it, it is quite cruel to even suggest that. I have been there been so vulnerable, lost, despondent and at a stage where I would have believed or tried anything.
What I can and do promise and what I see time and time again are remarkable and empowering journeys. People who were lost, broken, overwhelmed, drowning in feelings of loss, grief, fear, anger, hopelessness and wondering how much more their heart could take. Journeying from that space of coexisting to a more grounded place, a place of neutral and on to a space where they know and trust themselves. Where they can separate their stuff from that of others. Where they no longer let their own unhelpful responses and self sabotaging thoughts take over. Where they choose what they hear in the stories, opinions and ‘advice’ that others so freely offer (be it well meaning or not). Where they feel alive again, laugh again, have fun, feel connected to their partners, friends, family and most importantly to themselves. They still journey to have their baby, their family however that looks or whatever the result. The difference is that they are living while in the wait instead of waiting to live.
What I don’t promise is that you will never have a bad day, or ‘bad’ thoughts or feelings. We are human; life throws us shitty curve balls.
What I can promise and again what I do see is a greater awareness in people. That they have done, can do and will always cope no matter what comes their way. That no matter what happens they can handle it. That they know and trust themselves without reservation to make decisions and know the steps to take to support themselves emotionally, mentally, physically and socially. I am blown away every time.
People often need to reach a point where they feel they can’t take anymore and that is when they reach out. That is when the journey begins. It would be wonderful if we all gifted ourselves the space and awareness before we reach that point.
An emotional journey is a dynamic journey. What we want, what feels right, what we do and how we feel changes as we change.
Those I work with, those I see change in, come to me with an open mind, (naturally a pinch of doubt or uncertainty, but open) a sense of curiosity, a willingness to be accountable and to do the work. What I do promise is that if you do gift yourself this time, this space, amazing things will happen. They will happen because of you.
I know because it happened and continues to happen for me and it happens for my clients.
If this is how you would like to feel in 2022 please do get in touch. Take the time to think about how you would like to feel heading into a new year. Enjoy Christmas knowing that you can relax having made the decision to do something different and just for you.
From my home to yours wishing you a peaceful and relaxing Christmas.
Much love.
Dara